Insight

I've run the water and the bath tab started to fill up. I sat on the edge of the bath tab, watching the water.

And a storm of thoughts broke in with the picture at front of my eyes. It was amazing how a power like water's one, coming with the whole it's strentgh, faced the strenght of bath tab's walls and accepted their shapes. But there was something funny. Water's power created billions of bubbles, but it didn't brake their shape, water's power didn't brake the bubbles, which are NOTHING, but empty bubbles...pure air surrounded of soooooo tiny walls of soap-bubbles. Apparently the empty soap bubbles, the NOTHING was stronger than the water or bath tab's walls?!? Then I slowly put my feet one by one inside...The water let me sink down and we became ONE - the bath tab, the water, the soap bubbles and me. Four powers, four strenghts, four ONE... There was a fusion of four streams, creating ONE and still subsisting as such.

How could I ever let myself to be anything else or anybody else but myself?!? It was like a thunder!!!
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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a laboratory for mind's production and that way poluting the whole my being by mind's rubbish - sadness, insult, underestimation, obedience, resignation, accomulation of angur towards the others and myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to delude myself for applying a "free" "personal" choice.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be hopelessly enslaved by my false "beliefs" I am free.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a mind's mould and store there anything but any parts of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be forced to play other's games and pay the price for it - becoming a bunch of crap.

I stop HERE and I choose the main role in the game named: "Who I am"